Customer Reviews
Helpful - By: Ms. S. R. Hood, 03 Sep 2008 
After my Dad committed suicide unexpectedlyin 2008 I wanted to find some answers & thought that reading some books may be helpful. This is by far the best book I have found so far on the subject of helping those who have lost loved ones to suicide.
The book gives dozens of people's experiences & stories of their loss which, although incredibly sad & sometimes very difficult to read, have definitely helped me to come to terms with some of the feelings I have had following my Dad's death. Carla Fine explains the range of emotions that many people go through, those that are rational & those that are not, as well as delving deeply into her own experience of her husband's suicide & those stories of the people she has met since then who have also lost loved onesin similar ways.
I'd recommend this book to anyone going through something like this. It flows well & isn't a difficult readin terms of the way it is written - onlyin terms of the subject matter.
the only book worth reading on the subject - By: bucksman, 22 Jan 2008 
I lost my father to suicide 30 years ago this year. I was 13. Therapy, counselling wasn't really known of at the time, at least not to us, & certainly not to me.
Depression has haunted me ever since, sometimes seriously. Although nowadays, I can spot when it's coming, & after some reasonably good therapy, I can emotionally hide for a few days & then life continues as per normal.
I bought this book 3 years ago, as I still felt there were some aspects missing, & loads of questions that still remain unanswered. No-one out there can really help, as another reviewer has said,
"Some thingsin life have to be experienced, not studied, to be understood." Never a truer word spoken.
Anyone out there who isn't thinking of reading this, having gone through similar levels of emotional turmoil, I would strongly recommend they do so. If it gets too much for you, which it will at times, then put it down, & pick it up again later. The "later" part may well be an hour, it could be years. You WILL finish the book eventually.
I leant the book to my sister, who agreed with me it's the only thing she has read that actually reaches inside & comforts you. The social stigma which goes with this subject is still just as powerful today as it was then, as conversation stoppers go, it may not be firstin place, but it's ahead of second. This is the only book I have read, which even touches on this aspect. Raising this subject, & coming to terms with it, with potential long term partners has often ruined the relationship.
There is a note which starts one of the chapters, "you are trapped between you wanting this event to be the most important part of your life, & the least". These words are burnt onto the inside of my skull.
Thank you Carla, writing this book must have been one hell of a journey.
really helpful - By: me, 06 Sep 2006 I've read so much since being bereaved by suicide, but most literature is so academic & frustrating for the bereaved. I could relate to everything that was being said & talked aboutin this book - I could have written it myself. It was a relief to realise that my new "normality" was normal afterall. Thankyou Carla for having the courage to share.
Practical help for survivors - By: John Coyle, 04 Sep 2006 Bought for me by a thoughtful sister following the death of my sonin June 2006, this was the first book I'd read on suicide. The storiesin the book helped me (a) by helping me realise I am not alonein the thoughts & feelings I am having - & that,in itself, has been a comfort (b) by helping to clarify my thinking about my son's suicide - she captures some of the ideas I've been struggling with so well & (c) by providing insights & information (e.g. "A suicidal person is like a black hole of pain. You can give & give but you just can't fill it up".) I recommend it to survivors.
But there is a down side. She luxuriatesin high-flown languagein her commentary &in the telling of her own story: for example, she can't describe the consulting room where her husband diedin simple terms: it has to be "my husband's killing ground" - just excessive & self-indulgent; to much of "me, me, me" I feel. Thankfully, her telling of other people's stories is straightforward & it isin these you will find parallels with your own situation which is really helpful.
IT HELPED ME! - By: Ms. Carol George, 22 Feb 2005 After 4 years of wanderingin the mist of lonliness, since my best friend took her life, this book has helped me. To know there are others going through similar isolation.
I recommend this book to all survivors. (when they are ready). I would not have appreciated someone buying this for me. Everyone at their own pace.
If you are feeling the lonliness after lossing someone to suicide, (and the rest), this may help.
